Fen (wring_my_neck) wrote in femme_ftm,
Fen
wring_my_neck
femme_ftm

HAIR

Hi! I'm Fen, FTM and genderneutral (it's complicated)
As of now, I don't even have a binder due to lack of money, but I am thinking about getting a haircut. The problem is, I'm really shy in person and I'm scared the hairstylist will ask why I want a boy's haircut. Also, I love my hair as it is, but it's very girly. Any of you felt the same way? Or, any of you have really cute emo hair?
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ugh yeah i've never worked up the balls to specifically tell a hairstylist to give me a men's cut. and it makes me anxious thinking about it so then i just end up buzzing off my hair at home haha. or getting my hair cut and then fixing the sideburns to boy-sideburns afterwards. Meh.

but if you love your hair as is, i don't see why you need to change it, just to be less girly? like being girly and being ftm are totes compatible things. and while i personally prefer more masculine-ish hair (to contrast with my eyeliner and glitter nail polish lol) there's no reason anyone should feel compelled to conform to that.
Well, it's half "people will always take me as a girl with this hair" and half "I really like boy's emo/scene hair, I just don't quite have the courage"
gotcha, fair enough.
well, sending courage your way or something. sorry i don't have any real advice. good luck!
If you're nervous about diving into short hair right away, I actually recommend getting some sort of mullet first. Think scene kid minus the teasing, not Joe Dirt. I had one a couple years ago (I'm gothed up for a concert, but the blond is indeed my own hair) and it's good for giving the overall impression of short hair so you can decide if you like it while retaining some length in case you don't :)
Ooh, that's really awesome!
I was nervous as well when I first went to get a proper guy's haircut. My strategy was to take along a photo of what I wanted, because I figured I would be too nervous to describe exactly what I wanted. I've only had trouble twice; once was when I forgot to bring a picture, and the lady was completely convinced I wanted a pixie cut, not a real guy's cut. The second time was because the lady was really overexcited about the haircut I picked (...still not sure why) and asked me a million questions, which just made me uncomfortable because I'm not a talker. Other than that, they usually just take the picture, and the only question I get is whether or not I want sideburns.
That's good to know. I do have pictures, but I've never had short hair so I'm confused as to how it works with long bangs XD
I just told them I was in a show and needed short hair. [ I -am- an actor, but how do they know YOU'RE not? =] ]
This always worked for me as well.
I am in the same boat right now. I consider myself a to be more gender neutral but a trans boy at the same time... and my hair is long and girly at the moment 8C

I have had long hair forever but have been considering getting it short in a sort of boyish scene/emo hair style. I'm really shy and scared about going in and asking for a "boy's" cut because a) general anxiety and b) worry that they'll give me a cut that's way more "girlish" than I'd prefer. (Will be watching this thread for any advice!)

The way I've been dealing with it so far though is trying to get my mother to cut it shorter and shorter each time in the sort of style I'm going for. She used to be a hair dresser for a couple years so, she's not an awesome stylist but can at least cut hair evenly.

I'd suggest maybe trying to find a friend who can cut hair, or a friend of a friend that you may be more comfortable with asking for a boyish cut? And if you're afraid of getting it short, maybe do what I'm doing and get a little off at a time?

Regardless of if you go to a salon or find someone else, having pictures of the hairstyle you want from various angles would probably help tons. My partner had a problem with stylists not really listening too well, giving him cuts that were way too 'womanish', but having multiple photos of what he wanted helped him get much better hair cuts.

I personally love long hair, and love having it, but it just reads way too easily as "girl" on me. SIGH.

Good luck!
Are you me? XD
That's what I thought xD

Off topic from what you asked, but I just noticed you said you don't have a binder due to lack of money, so I thought I'd link this if you were interested:

http://ftmgaragesale.livejournal.com/ -- you may be able to find a used binder at a discount.

If you haven't checked there before, something to consider. NOT trying to be pushy, or say you NEED to bind, certainly you should do whatever makes you most comfortable. There's also the chance of finding a kind soul who will donate a binder too, if you keep your eyes out or ask around.
Oh, thank you! Do you have any resources about size? I have no idea how binders work with larger chests, all the transboys I know are B or C cups.
Hmmm... resources about sizes in particular.

There's this: http://chestbinders.wordpress.com/

It has reviews on different kinds of binders, the reviewers note their chest size and how effective the binders bind, so that may help choosing a KIND of binder.

If you get a binder from http://ftm.underworks.com/, either new or used from someone else, they have a guide on how to measure for size at the top of the page. Can't say that guide would be the same for other companies though.

I am a D myself (Or DD? I'm not ENTIRELY sure, but something around there), and find a really tight sports bra (the ones I use I think are for A cups?) can hold me in and flatten me out enough to help with some dysphoria and give me a kind of convincing flat chest in a baggy shirt with a hoodie or something over it. Not ideal, but might work as a decent in-the-mean-time kind of thing.

I'm actually waiting on binder from underworks in mail right now, the 997, which is supposed to work pretty well for larger chests, but can't say personally as of yet.
thank you so much <3
the sports bra doesn't hurt?

seasonsofwither

6 years ago

I took a photo of a male celeb (Ryan Ross from Panic At The Disco) with me to the hairdressers, and asked them to cut it like that. They didn't ask me why I wanted a male haircut! Just be bold, and if they make it awkward, just laugh it off. Good luck!
Ooh, which Ryan hairdo?
Ryhawk!
you had a ryhawk? pix?
For haircuts, I'd say travel to a more major city (if you're not in one) and go to a place there. Trust me, they probably encounter "weirder" things then a "girl" asking for a guys' cut.

What haircut do you exactly want? (photos~)
Also, have you thought about cutting it yourself? Since I was about 16, I've been mostly cutting my own hair and it's not as hard as you might think. Scary as hell, but not hard. Just need a good mirror set up with a good pair of scissors.
I live outside of DC, so maybe I could go there :P
I was thinking the guy in this video- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GsbLk3NnT30
I don't have any clue how to cut hair short, sadly.
The blonde guy that is the main guy in the video, I'm guessing. I say bring a front, side, side, and back of the haircut and you'll be fine. In our area over here, I've seen that on both genders so it might be an unisex haircut over there, too.
It's also not that hard but I'd have trouble explaining how to do it, sorry.
your cute
Fen-

Did you ever get your haircut?

yeah :D can't find any good pics tho